A very Slytherin-like Harry, really. Lots of good moments, but so very vengeful and angry that it was hard to recognize the foursome as Gryffindors. Not that the prats didn't deserve what they got, but still...I like the Down Under Curse way of getting even much better (yeah, just finished reading it).

Interesting reading of the "foursome's" characters on your part. Harry was not intended to be particularly angry. He's past that now; what he is, is determined -- determined to see all the bigots and bullies who tacitly and covertly (or not so covertly) supported Moldieshorts and his ideals, and who weren't caught or killed when Tommy-boy got his, pay for their crimes.  and  are helping, and thoroughly enjoying getting some of their own back on people who have belittled and abused them for 6 or 7 years; so is , somewhat to her own surprise -- but now that her time at school is almost up, she finds that she's not averse to dishing out a little retribution. She'd have preferred that the ferret and his bodygoons be punished properly at the time by the school, but since they weren't, her sense of justice (and love of Ron) allows her to take steps that she wouldn't have done before.

Slytherin-like behaviour? I don't agree. Except for the ambush, which is a classic Marauder- and Weasley-style prank, Harry is fighting fair, out in the open. It's just that, now, the Slythergits have nowhere to squirm out of the much-deserved consequences of their actions.

Oh, well, to each their own...

What a brilliant story! Well done. I enjoyed it immensley!

*snicker*

Oh, FUN story.  Those that he couldn't go after for criminal reasons (Snape and Ferret Jr) get SUED instead.  Priceless!

Dumbledore's reaction was great, too.  Thanks for sharing.

Wow is all I can say!  that was awsome, like always you should seriously write more chapters to that.  I'm totally hooked.

levotatingT

I just really loved it. So wonderfully original, but if you think of the Harry we all know so very very appropriate. The child who has been kicked around since birth grows up to be a youth capable of love, honesty and friendship. The youth who defeats Voldy and saves the world would definitely want to take revenge his way.

Great story. And I want a sequel - not just your story line for one.

I think you've written it for me... .

Have a look at one of my earlier responses to see some of the things I came up with for the non-existent sequel/second chapter. Perhaps your idea could be part of the way in which the Walrus Road Orphanage came to be built -- though events would take place in a slightly different way, because I decided  &  would elope and leave  &  to go through the big society wedding in their place .

Thanks anyway, art.

I must say, reading your responses to reviews is almost as much fun as reading the story itself!

Now I just wish I could get my computer back so I could beta read your next offering...

Allie
on The Hubby's laptop

OH MY G-D!!!!! This was absolutely wonderful! I loved every single aspect about this! I loved it!

~Maria~

Afraid not. It's a one-shot. You'll just have to imagine cetain things to be seen in a few years' time: the long line at the Unemployed Death Eaters Benefit Soup Kitchen; Snape working in the St Mungo's Pharmeceutical Potions Laboratory; the DME scratching their heads at the phenomenal rise in standards of OWL and NEWT results in Potions and DADA; the rows and rows of identical houses on the new Ferret Gardens housing estate, built on a disused landfill site; the wizarding wedding of the Millennium, on which a small fortune was spent by the wealthy Potter and Weasley families, but which caused a unprecedented scandal when the bride and groom eloped that morning, leaving a note (and a wedding dress in Hermione's size) that suggested that the best man and maid of honour should marry in their stead -- which they did; the establishment of the Walrus Road (formerly Privet Drive) Orphanage and Refuge for Mistreated Children; the endowment of the Padfoot & Prongs Memorial Chair In Transfiguration and Animagus Transformation at Hogwarts, the first incumbent of which was one Professor Granger-Weasley... and a whole lot more.

BTW, welcome and congratulations on your first review. I'm honoured to have been the inspiration for your first comments. Feel free to do lots more.

I LOVED IT! Oh Harry telling of Snape and Malfoy was priceless. WONDERFUL!!!

-lain

Happy Holidays

Your stories are always so original and entertaining, and this is no exception. You've certainly given Harry a unique way of getting even, but I found it quite compeling. Harry's a singleminded enough character to actually pull something like this off if the idea struck his fancy.

In the context of the story, Harry trying to bankrupt Malfoy makes the most sense. It's hard to argue with him when he says the ferret's vile attitute is based entirely on the contents of his bank vault. It's only appropriate that should be his downfall.

However, I found the case against Snape rather more entertaining, probably because I wasn't expecting it. But Snape definitely deserves his comeuppance as well and double the Slytherin bashing is double the fun. I especially enjoyed you made the discussion of the suit is just the opposite of what Potions class is like -- Harry doing all the talking and Snape afraid to say anything lest he make the situation worse.

"And now we'll see what the Law has to say about you, Professor. I'd find myself a good legal firm if I were you, but you can't have mine -- it's busy. Very busy."

I had quite a chuckle at that line; it sums up that side of the story nicely.

It was also quite cleaver of you to work a fluffy angle in at the end here. Harry makes what is probably the least romantic marriage proposal I've ever seen in a fic but it certainly fits with a story. It might have made for a more interesting plot had Ginny not taken Harry's lack of tact so well (now that could have made for quite the courtroom scene  ), but the light ending leaves everybody's happy. Well, everyone except Snape and Malfoy, which makes it all the better!

Nice job on another fun story!
-KC

The ambush was simply a way to serve Malfeasance and the Tweedle Twins with their Injunctions and other paperwork. I doubt it would lead to a counter-suit because:

a) Ferret-features' ego is too big;

b) it would be easy to claim provocation and self-defence -- the Blond Smirker and his thugs were the ones who accosted Ron and Hermione in the first place, so it was 3 v 2 as far as they knew. In addition, all three Slytherins are known to be erstwhile supporters of Voldemort and prone to violence, so all Harry and Ginny would have to claim was that they were on their way to serve them with the papers when they saw three known enemies in the processing of verbally and physically attacking their friends (two Prefects, it should be noted, and Hermione was probably the Head Girl) in what could easily have been a revenge attack. With a war just ended, that would be considered reasonable behaviour by most people, particularly given the long history of animosity between the snakes and the Gryffindors, which includes more than one unprovoked physical and magical attack. Given that it's Harry, Conquerer of Voldemort, saying this about the sons of known Death Eaters, I doubt any claims to the contrary would be given much credence just then; and

c) Malfandango can't afford to launch counter-suits, or won't be able to, shortly; he's going to need all the money that he has -- or is prepared to spend; I would expect him to do his best to hide as many assets as he can -- to defend himself and his family. Of course, he could lash out blindly with counter-suits, but Harry wouldn't care; the whole purpose of what he's doing is to force the ferret to drain the family coffers. And given that all the snakes could claim was that they'd been Stunned, I doubt they'd get much sympathy.

As for H&M, please read my earlier response: I am working on it -- why, just last night, I nearly drove one character insane. It's coming, folks, and I do appreciate the enthusiasm. I cannot promise anything and won't, but I hope that I might get the next chapter out by Christmas. We'll see.

*sobbing inconsolably*

Ah, got you now. I think you'll find that using chapters is something that, these days (didn't TCoM have chapters?), Pterry only does in his "children's" books like TWFM, The Amazing Maurice and His Educated Rodents and A Hat Full of Sky (and possibly not all of those; I'm going from memory here), presumably at the request of his publishers -- or maybe he thinks it's a good idea himself; I'll have to check L-Space and see what that has to say on the matter.

In any case, the so-called children's books are a better read than many an adult novel (even some Pratchetts!).

Effin' brilliant.  Really.

I've always sort of wondered how rich Harry really is.  He doesn't *care*, obviously, and JKR isn't saying.  But the Potters are an old and influential family, and Harry has piles and piles of gold in that little vault of his.  Plus whatever Sirius leaves him (and you just know that a lot of that is going to go to Harry).  Money talks.

And I'm *always* going to love any story where the Ferret gets what's coming to him.  Especially one as well written as this.

The only complaint is....why'd Hermione have to do that?  I mean, I know he probably deserved it, but still.  That's just wrong.  *winces in sympathy*

I am very very very very very happy that my parents are lawyers, because I actually understood most of the legal stuff!  Yay!  I thought this was a veryamusing little ficlet, a little OOC, but I love it all the same!

I am STILL giggling madly over this piece.  I loved that Legal Howler! -- and the way that Harry took Draco down, piece by piece by piece. 

Tarkas, I think you've just made my holiday brighter.

Absolutely brilliant!  To get even in the courts is perfect!  and the look on both their faces was priceless!  By far one of the best "revenge" stories I've read.

Robert

Great new story, I wonder if we couldn't get a second look at this and see the effects this causes later.

Its great to know that you are still around here with us. I was wondering what happened to you but can only assume that RL has gotten to be the pain it always is. Hopefully you can provide us with many more stories.

gallandro_83

*Sings* You don't spit into the wind, You don't pull the mask off the lone Death Eater and you don't mess around with Him!

'Him' of course being Harry! A moment of perfection! A perfect ending for the Malferret (I adore that nickname BTW!) and his Greasiness Snape... All tied up in legal snarls and enough red tape to drown the squid! This felt so accurate that I have to ask; do you work in a legal office, perchance?

The idea of a Legal Howler is brilliant but I do wish you had told us what Harry was planning for the Dursleys...

I'm also very glad to find that someone else has the same writing pattern that I do!

I can't take credit for "Malferret," I'm afraid; from memory, it comes from a thread at GinnyPotter.com, along with a number of other like names for the prat. I will claim to have invented an obscene one, but I can't quote it here.

What does Harry have planned for the Dursleys? Much the same as he has for Moronfoy (just thought of that one! ), but in the Muggle courts -- which may or may not lead to criminal prosecution once certain authorities learn of the Dursley version of taking care of their nephew. The latter doesn't really matter, though, because Harry only needs to keep hammering away at his relatives until they're broke. Whether he would then buy 4 Privet Drive and turn it into, say, a battered wives' refuge or a rehabilitation centre for drug addicts, I couldn't say, but it would fit the general pattern of his revenge.

I don't work in any sort of legal office, but I do have a son who is a trainee barrister -- and, for all I know, another one in the works, as his brother is also somewhat interested in doing law -- but neither of them helped with this, except to answer a question from Allie, my Most Esteemed Beta, on British legal terminology.

As for writing patterns... I esteem CS Forrester and love his Napoleonic naval stories, but I couldn't write the way he did. My mind is too visual: for instance, the Legal Howler came from a mental picture of a large black envelope floating in mid-air and unfolding itself, and then That Voice started speaking...

WOW, that was cool. What an imagination. I loved reading how harry was one step ahead of malfoy and snape....

This story just went into my favorite folder.....

Well, that was just wonderful!!

It's so nice to see someone get back at Malfoy. I get so sick of reading stories where Lucius Malfoy get away with terrorism and murder and Draco Malfoy gets away with abuse, bullying etc in school and no one does anything about it, but all Harry has to do is try and defend someone from dementors (or whatever) and he's up in front of the Wizengamot.

I loved this and laughed my head off. 

I'd have to salute the quotes from R.A.H. and Pratchet (though since when does that man use Chapter Numbers in his books!?!?) even if I hadn't liked the story, but since I did like the story, I'll just make that a small note.

I have to admit I did not see the 'proposal' if that's what you call it, coming. However, I think it would be very much in character for The Boy Who Finally Got Over Being Moody, Noticed Ginny, and Defeated Voldemort.

Though he should have had a ring - it isn't a real marriage proposal unless you have a ring.

Glad you didn't forget Snape either - actually, he probably deserves a civil suit more than anyone else in canon (though I'm not generally a fan of either civil suits or lawyers, in this case I'll make an exception). Malfoy's an annoying little crumb, but Snape actually holds a position of authority. For that matter a suit against Dumbledore (as Headmaster) might not be out of line... but I digress.

Once again, you have delivered a most excellent piece of storytelling with good characterization. Thank you!

Um, Gridley, mate... what chapter numbers?

The "proposal" was really just an excuse to use the line about Breach of Promise -- I thought it'd be appropriate, given the legal nature of the story -- though I do think that Harry, being in the process of sorting out his life after taking care of Ol' Moldy, might well give due consideration to the thought of companionship, and who better than ? He also wasn't completely sure how she would feel about the idea, so he's saving getting a ring for later -- something which I can attest can be quite fun.

Ahhh Justice was Served....

Simply Brilliant!!!

~J~

As I read this story, I had two reactions.  The first -

and the second - !

This is the perfect story of Harry's revenge.  I love it that he is finally able to get back at those who have tormented him all these years, and there is nothing that they can do about it!

I loved it!!

Yes, this is very much a "biter bit" story. All his life, Malferret has swaggered around, secure in the knowledge that his family status will protect him -- but now, he's up against someone who it can't defeat, and who can use the same weapons of influence and money against him, but on a scale that he can't match. Say goodnight, Gracie...

Same for : he can lord it over helpless students, but now they're not so helpless, and his primary defence of recent years -- the need to preserve his cover as a double agent -- is no longer there, so he's on his own, and he's going to have to learn that song with the chorus, "You don't tug on Superman's cape..."

Both of them (and many others) have made the mistake of incurring the wrath of someone who has the willingness and the resources to make their lives hell, and sees no reason not to -- it's only money, after all.