caleb nova
Sunday 4th January 2009 04:38 | Ten Little Lions |
Interesting. I don't think I've ever read a Harry Potter mystery genre fic before. I enjoyed it, which you can take as an especial compliment as the mystery genre has never interested me.
With a strained, higher than usual voice, Hermione admonished Ron. “Honestly! A body will not begin to smell so soon. It takes at least 24 hours at room temperature before putrification begins to create an odour.”
I feel compelled to point out, for the sake of realism, that a badly damaged body will begin to stink immediately due to blood loss and opened cavities. Blood has a very strong smell to it, especially when mingled with other bodily fluids.
Rather messy of Voldemort to simply leave his butchered minion there on the train. Never allow your opponent to see dissension in your ranks. Of course, knowing Greyback it's entirely possible it was all his doing. He is not a subtle creature.
I was interested to see your characterization of Luna. I thought it was very different from mine, and so it was fun to view her in a different light. I think a lot of authors avoid her. She can be difficult to hear.
A good read and even a good mystery to boot. |
| Monday 5th January 2009 06:34 | Ten Little Lions (Author Response) |
I'm surprised and pleased one of my favorite authors found my story enjoyable. The mystery aspect was tough to do, it was my first try at that sort of thing. I wrote the story as canon compliant, so far as I knew pre-DH. Luna is my take on canon Luna. I never understood why some folks avoid Luna, she is such fun to write. Any old stray thought can become her dialogue!
The body... Ahem. Well, yeah, since good old whozits was still oozing life all over the rear of the carriage he probably did smell a bit. I'm fortunate not to have a lot of knowledge about human decomposition, short term or otherwise. But hey Grayback WAS discreet. He stuffed the body into the loo, where he expected no one to notice it. Its not MY fault Grayback is as subtle as a beer fart in an airlock. |
majolie
Friday 28th December 2007 19:09 | Ten Little Lions |
| I found this to be very enjoyable. I have always found Nott to be an intriguing character - I guess because there is so little of him in canon. You write very well and I am going to look for more of your work now that I've discovered it. |
| Saturday 29th December 2007 15:32 | Ten Little Lions (Author Response) |
| Thank you for the kind comments! I was surprised to see a review of Ten Little Lions, it has sort of fallen into "old story limbo." I am working on something longer than a one-shot, it needs a lot more work before it sees the light of day. Have a Happy New Year! |
Sovran
Thursday 5th April 2007 11:40 | Ten Little Lions |
How did I not know that you had written your own stories? Shame on me.
You did a great job with the characters in this story. Hermione's back-and-forth between competence and fear is well done and seems quite fitting. Harry is in-character, and his realizing early on that he owes Ginny an apology is quite satisfying. I've never liked the idea of his staying clueless for very long after the funeral. That doesn't mean she should go along (she shouldn't), but she does deserve to know what's going on and to not feel abandoned.
The character that really surprised me, though, was Nott. You did a great job of keeping him unpleasantly Slytherish while at the same time making it clear that he's not one of Voldemort's sycophants. I don't like him at all, but I do like his character.
I also loved the way that Ginny wasn't in the story, but she remained very central to it. I always like to see Ginny get more page-time, but in this case I can see how having her elsewhere served the story better.
Well done! |
| Thursday 5th April 2007 17:19 | Ten Little Lions (Author Response) |
Thanks for the praise Dave! I appreciate it coming from one of my favorite authors.
Yeah, good ol' Teddy Nott. He is an interesting character, especially with Jo's notes about him and Draco chatting at Malfoy's manorhouse.
I do hope Ron and Hermione slap some sense into Harry in DH, but we have to wait another few months to find out, eh?
Chuck |
TreyFury97
Tuesday 19th December 2006 11:30 | Ten Little Lions |
Wow... I know you were just doing it for a summer challenge... but If you were to turn this into a full-fledged story, I would've been first in line to read it. Great piece of writing.
Trey |
| Wednesday 20th December 2006 11:47 | Ten Little Lions (Author Response) |
I am lazy and gave my response to your review in GryffindorDragon's remarks.
Thanks for reading and reviewing! |
GryffindorDragon
Tuesday 19th December 2006 09:47 | Ten Little Lions |
Interesting. Are you going to continue this on? Are the ten going to start dropping one by one?
|
| Wednesday 20th December 2006 11:45 | Ten Little Lions (Author Response) |
I am going to be lazy and use this response for your review and TreyFury97's too. I was wondering why I was being asked about continuing the story, I had submitted it as a one-shot. Then I read the summary info and saw it marked as WIP. Ah ha.
You know, there are a number of plot points that bear continuation. How will Mcgonagall take her House being directly targeted? What about the other Gryffindors on the list? How will Harry try to apologize to Ginny. Oh and then there is that little background plot of Voldemort "in all his grisly glory."
I write sloooow and am currently working on a different story, but I think I will return to the Ten Little Lions mini-verse again.
Thanks for reading and the kind review. |
CrumpleHornedKiwi
Tuesday 19th December 2006 02:11 | Ten Little Lions |
What a great start - a bit more blood and guts than I'm used to but a great little thriller.
I hope to see an update soon. |
| Wednesday 20th December 2006 11:31 | Ten Little Lions (Author Response) |
| Uh yeah. The blood and guts part. Well unfortunately real violent death is rather messy. If you were thinking "oh this is so gross!" that is the feeling I wanted to impart. |
lantis222
Monday 18th December 2006 19:23 | Ten Little Lions |
| Interesting. I can't wait to see what happens next. Nott definatly knows more than he is letting on. Good job! |
| Monday 18th December 2006 20:02 | Ten Little Lions (Author Response) |
| Thanks! I have held a minor fascination for Theodore Nott ever since JKR referred to him and Malfoy at Malfoy Manor. Pity her scene didn't make it into the story proper. |
