Vyperr
Tuesday 11th August 2009 12:01 | Meaning of One, Part Two: Chambers and Secrets |
Can't wait for the rest of this story. Please let me know when the next chapter is up.
greybeard666@hotmail.com |
| Monday 17th August 2009 08:00 | Meaning of One, Part Two: Chambers and Secrets (Author Response) |
| The easiest way to find out is simply to sign up for author updates. Thanks for reading. |
anniep
Saturday 25th July 2009 07:56 | Meaning of One, Part Two: Chambers and Secrets |
Sorry, I thought I was done, but I wasn’t.
The last sentence was perfect!!
You’ve spent a lot of the last two chapters on characterization, building us up to Harry’s petrification (no, you didn’t kill him). H&G tried to explain to McGonagall how their lives changed and her acknowledgment that the former children no longer exist were quite the lead-in to another pivotal point for them. This major shift in the story from canon is so original and so right. Poor Ginny!
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| Sunday 26th July 2009 22:52 | Meaning of One, Part Two: Chambers and Secrets (Author Response) |
I'm certainly not going to complain if you have more to say.
I think you might be the very first reviewer to pick up on the characterization build-up to the cliffhanger. Though McG doesn't know it, the reader is aware that, indeed, the original Harry and Ginny do not exist. Ginny cannot go back to the girl she once was. Who or what will she become now, then?
Anyway, you're entirely correct, and I hope you enjoy the story's direction. |
anniep
Saturday 25th July 2009 07:31 | Meaning of One, Part Two: Chambers and Secrets |
This is actually for chapters 19 and 20, hope you don't mind.
Your chapter titles must be chosen with great deliberation. After I finish reading a chapter I stop to think about the title and the ways it relates to that portion of the story. “Prelude” is rather obvious with the onset of puberty and all the physical and emotional changes that are coming for the pair. Ginny’s mixed feelings about growing up were well presented. I can imagine that if anything will cause those two to fight it will be this period of life when you don’t understand yourself, much less anyone else. I also hope this chapter was a prelude to Molly’s new and improved relationship with Harry&Ginny. It was easy for her to slip back to her former, close relationship with just Ginny present, but I was cheering for her when she worked through the reminders of Harry’s presence with a grace we haven’t yet seen from her. There are so many levels of perceptions happening in chapter 20, the saddest of which is Harry’s continued ostracism from the other students. It’s not any longer than in Chamber of Secrets, but somehow your reminders of it are more poignant.
As I understood it, while Ginny was with her mum, getting advice and shopping, Harry was sitting in the classroom staring at the wall or desk. Why couldn’t he read, like Hermione and Luna were, in order to give Ginny some private time with her mum? Sure, nothing can ever be completely private for either of them from the other, but at least some “back off” time needs to be granted until one has a chance to accept or understand something new before the other one is in the middle of it. Maybe I’m really not grasping that concept of two being one? I’ll go join Molly in the other room.
You handled the kissing very well. At first I was disturbed at the thought of children at 11 & 12 kissing like that, but acceleration of their physical relationship is rather inevitable. Their realization that such actions can be addictive and their resultant restraint was very mature and helped this reader accept this new level of their relationship.
Beatrice and Benedick—they’re one of my favorite couples in literature!
Transfiguration classes are going to get very interesting for Wormtail. (cue evil laughter from your readers)
Minerva’s discussion with Harry&Ginny about Arithmancy and learning was fantastic. Are you a teacher? Early in the scene I wondered why she didn’t just offer to give them a placement test in maths to help them, but her speech about teaching and learning was so much more helpful. There are very few people gifted to be true teachers like that; I wish I could be one of her students.
Many thanks for updating your story; I really appreciate your attention to detail and human nature.
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| Sunday 26th July 2009 22:50 | Meaning of One, Part Two: Chambers and Secrets (Author Response) |
Ah, wonderful. There are few things I like better than a long, thoughtful review. I'm not worried about how many chapters it covers.
You've definitely spotted the primary usages of "prelude". That chapter was also something of a prelude to the next one; it was the last easy chapter before things got interesting.
in regards to Harry's activities while Ginny was shopping, it doesn't quite work that way. They can make an effort to ignore the other's senses, but it's not easy. They generally prefer to keep their senses combined, and if they need to, they focus on just one set of inputs. If Harry were reading while Ginny shopped, they would constantly struggle not to let their joint attention fixate on either the shopping or the reading. Doing it the way they did, Harry did essentially 'back off'. He didn't talk much, didn't distract Ginny from her time with her mum, and didn't offer any opinions or feelings. He just tuned out so that Ginny could be as much 'with' her mother as possible.
I got to thinking about it, and a lot of 12-year-olds were kissing when I was that age (not I, quite). It wasn't any kind of heavy kissing, but they were definitely interested. My impression is that girls become interested much sooner than that, but they don't really have the opportunity to try it until the guys become interested. Thus, once they're of an age to both be interested, they're going to try it. That said, I also felt a little cautious about that scene, because they are quite young. I don't want to make anyone uncomfortable, least of all myself. So I'll be treading carefully for a while.
I'm not a teacher, no. I developed that perspective (the one McG explains) by watching good teachers, bad teachers, good students, and bad students. I decided early on that teaching is at the core of McG's character; she is the foil to Dumbledore, who in my opinion is not so much a teacher as a thinker.
Thanks for taking the time to review so carefully. I always look forward to your reviews. |
stonerkenobi11
Thursday 23rd July 2009 22:45 | Meaning of One, Part Two: Chambers and Secrets |
| Looks like harry caught a site of the basilisk! I really enjoy your story so far and look forward to it progressing! |
| Sunday 26th July 2009 22:39 | Meaning of One, Part Two: Chambers and Secrets (Author Response) |
| Thanks very much. I hope to post the next chapter soon. |
Jacynthe
Tuesday 21st July 2009 20:29 | Meaning of One, Part Two: Chambers and Secrets |
| Now THAT was a chapter ending -- neatly done! The rest was nice as well, especially the first bit as you gradually and quite naturally unwind the angst from the previous chapter. Ginny gossiping with the girls is very funny. |
| Sunday 26th July 2009 22:39 | Meaning of One, Part Two: Chambers and Secrets (Author Response) |
I'm glad you enjoyed the gossip... it was quite difficult for me to write. Pre-teen girls have always been mysterious creatures to me. Only slightly more mysterious than, for instance, Martians.
Thanks! |
LeprechaunJV
Tuesday 21st July 2009 08:41 | Meaning of One, Part Two: Chambers and Secrets |
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| Sunday 26th July 2009 22:36 | Meaning of One, Part Two: Chambers and Secrets (Author Response) |
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aimless`
Monday 20th July 2009 18:27 | Meaning of One, Part Two: Chambers and Secrets |
indeed...
nice chapter, waiting for the next with realise of cliffhanger |
| Sunday 26th July 2009 22:36 | Meaning of One, Part Two: Chambers and Secrets (Author Response) |
| I hope to post the next one fairly soon. Thanks for reading. |
senyah mastery
Monday 20th July 2009 16:34 | Meaning of One, Part Two: Chambers and Secrets |
NO!!! oh man now i have to wait for the NEXT chapter... you are cruel indeed my friend. very cruel indeed.... otherwise good chapter ^^
Senyah |
| Sunday 26th July 2009 22:35 | Meaning of One, Part Two: Chambers and Secrets (Author Response) |
Sometimes you have to be cruel to be kind, right? I sure hope so.
Thanks for reading. I hope to post the next chapter soon. |
aharkins
Monday 20th July 2009 16:32 | Meaning of One, Part Two: Chambers and Secrets |
What all those other reviewers said - That goes for me too. It was all I could do not to scream in frustration when I realized that you were leaving us hanging like that. Please please please update soon. God - you are so evil.
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| Sunday 26th July 2009 22:35 | Meaning of One, Part Two: Chambers and Secrets (Author Response) |
| Sorry about that. I hope to post the next chapter soon. Thanks! |
CornedBee
Monday 20th July 2009 12:12 | Meaning of One, Part Two: Chambers and Secrets |
Oh my God, you're evil! Evil, evil, evil! That's got to be the worst cliffhanger I've ever seen in any fan fiction. Are you sure Tom Riddle is not possessing you to do this?
Yeah, about the rest of the chapter. It's always fun to read girl talk, but your particular twist makes it even more enjoyable.
The twins' prank is genius, if cruel. It's also an interesting take on Lockhart. Not unrealistic - he's faked everything he's done, so why not what he looks like? - but very unusual.
I also love the idea of seeing a new elective first-hand. Ginny is going to take Arithmancy and Harry Divination, right? It would fit.
Right, now I can go back to sitting in a corner and whimpering. |
| Sunday 26th July 2009 22:34 | Meaning of One, Part Two: Chambers and Secrets (Author Response) |
Hmm. If Tom were possessing me, would I know it?
The girl talk was tough for me, so I'm really glad you enjoyed it.
I thought that it fit for Lockhart to be older than he looks in canon. And it provides certain clues that I find useful.
Thanks for reading. I hope to post the next chapter soon. |
zeta_one
Monday 20th July 2009 11:31 | Meaning of One, Part Two: Chambers and Secrets |
OHHH NOOO! You are so mean to leave ius hanging like that! Does this mean Ginny is going to face Riddle instead of Harry? What a great chapter! Thanks for sharing.
P.S. The obligated “Please update soon” line.
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| Sunday 26th July 2009 22:33 | Meaning of One, Part Two: Chambers and Secrets (Author Response) |
| I'm glad you enjoyed the chapter. I hope to post the next one soon. |
the_critic
Monday 20th July 2009 10:59 | Meaning of One, Part Two: Chambers and Secrets |
OH MY GOD!
If you don't update again soon, I'm going to be so upset! Harry's seen the basilisk! But was it a reflection, or the real thing?
...And what will Ginny do? OMG. OMG. OMG. OMG. OMG. I haven't been this panicked about a story in a really long time. Not since NoFP and the bogart---(do you read NOFP? If you do you should remember that cliffie)
OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY GOD!
Please! I'll do anything! Just update soon! *starts crying*
Critic.
Wahhhhh! PLEASE!
I LOVE YOU! |
| Sunday 26th July 2009 22:32 | Meaning of One, Part Two: Chambers and Secrets (Author Response) |
Funny thing about this chapter . . . several people have said they hate me, and several have said they love me. One person said both. Maybe I should keep score?
Anyway, I'm glad you liked the chapter. I do read NoFP, and the cliffie you mention was really well done. I'm happy to be in that company.
I hope to post the next chapter soon. Thanks! |
saulick
Monday 20th July 2009 06:51 | Meaning of One, Part Two: Chambers and Secrets |
| Nice installment. Bit of a surprise at the end. I like it. Can't wait for the next chapter. |
| Sunday 26th July 2009 22:31 | Meaning of One, Part Two: Chambers and Secrets (Author Response) |
| Thanks very much. The next one should be posted soon. |
